Find a middle groundĮven if the two of you untangle her motives for being a little racy on social media as being innocent (say, she lost a ton of weight and wants to show off her hard work), you might still feel strongly about her toning things down a bit. Is she raises some or all of these red flags, then, yes, she is. That way you can hone in on the core issue here-navigating your different attitudes about sexuality and propriety on social media.ĭating 10 signs she’s too high maintenance This goes back to step two: Figuring out why she’s posting those photos in the first place. She’s free to make her choices (and that includes breaking up with you). You’re my girlfriend.'” You’re completely out of line to suggest she belongs to you, or that her pictures suggest sexual promiscuity. “Never say something volatile or judgmental like: ‘I don’t want my friends and family to think I’m dating a whore’ or ‘How dare you post inappropriate pictures like that. The more you pivot around your feelings, the more open she’ll be to hearing them out. I thought that was just for me,'” Sherman suggests. If she posted a photo in a skimpy bikini or in a revealing top, try something like: “‘I felt uncomfortable seeing you in something so revealing on a public forum. “Express your feelings using ‘I statements’ rather than making her the person in the wrong and attacking her,” Sherman says. Approach the touchy subject without being confrontational And that brings us to our next point:ĭating 7 ways to resolve any argument like a gentlemanĭefuse the most dreadful situations with hostage expert tips. It’s up to you to figure out which applies. If she’s a little immature relationship-wise and hasn’t had many serious relationships in the past, she might not consider how her posting could impact you.Īll (and more) of these could be possibilities. If she has a strong understanding of who she is and is unwavering in her self-confidence, her posts can merely be an extension of that. If you’ve seen some red flags that indicate she’s a bit insecure and seeks constant validation from you in order to feel content, that could point to her motives. “You can’t assume her feelings or motives unless you ask, but you can intuit where she could be coming from instead of only considering your own feelings,” Sherman says. (Remember, that’s a judgment call.) Or maybe it’s just part of her job (is she a model, spokesperson, or advocate for commercial platform?). Maybe it’s her form of self-expression-which is to say, she sees nothing “scandalous” about the photos. Moreover, she may not be honest with herself (and/or you) as to why she’s posting what you deem to be inappropriate photos on social media.įirst, the obvious: “She might need attention and is flaunting her sexuality to get it (which may not be about you, but can still affect you),” Sherman suggests. She could have a few different reasons for all her online posting. Consider why she’s posting scandalous photos online If you’re feeling protective and angry, that could be a reflection of your values regarding “privacy, boundaries, and sexuality-as well as fear of outside judgment,” she adds. And do you know where these feelings are coming from? “If you’re feeling jealous or insecure, you could be worried you’re not enough for her and she’s needing the attention of others,” Sherman explains. Some hypothetical questions: “Do you feel turned-on? The need to be controlling? Insecure?” Sherman says. Specifically, describe the situation and the emotions it’s conjuring. Talk to a close friend or even a therapist to act as a neutral sounding board. Understand how her sexy social media posts make you feelįew men ever talk about this, but you need to figure out why you’re upset because of your girlfriend’s pictures. Dating 20 Signs She’s Not Worth Your Timeĭon't get strung along.
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